there is pain

pain between my ribs pushing and crushing and crunching and hurting pain that sears pain that festers there is a pain and something leaking out i cannot contain it it holds me it fuels me it binds me to heaven and earth to this universe that has destroyed me and birthed me again so many times i cannot contain my pain it leaks it leaks out and it will spread if i do not contain it if i do not let if hurt me from in between my ribs it separates in a way no other thing can it is all i can do to keep from flying into a million different pieces inspiring is demise and pain is not demise it is only the beginnings it is only the promise of pain to come and demise to be coveted as a finish line from one cup of coffee to the next from one hole to be filled to the next it is a rasping and a coughing pain it is a clawing and a chaffing pain it is a twisting and a pain that i selfishly divulge to myself and myself alone i cannot see it i cannot nor can i hear it but i can taste it in my mouth wet and inviting but bitter and poisonous and i cannot contain it if i cannot taste it if i cannot remember why it is there if i cannot remember that it was once invited upon me and asked to come in like a neighbor through the front door and like heated summer air it cooks and violates without end it pools and pools and ever so subtly is shaken regularly to stir and crackle and burn and rot and there is no sign of stopping and there is no space within that is not a void of pain that bites and snarls and barks and growls warning of the inevitable searing you have mistaken that taste on your tongue for ginger rather it be that brittle sting that nostalgic emotion of everlasting ache